A cheesegeek guide to writing a banging 10/10 gift message

Here at cheese HQ we see a LOT of cheese gifts making their way from us to the chosen recipients. It makes our Operations team’s day when they come across an expertly crafted gift message (yes there is someone who reads them on the other end). We know the struggle can be real to kick off your gift message so we’ve written a gift message guide to give you a helping hand with a little injection of cheesy humour (after years of gift message osmosis we think we’re just slightly qualified). 

Happy Birthday Gift 

• ​​Happy Birthday to you. I hope you enjoy your day as much as I enjoy eating cheese (hint hint, my birthday is coming up soon)

Or, Happy Birthday for the pun lovers (we had to)

• Happy Birthday, Gorgeous. You’re looking GOUDA, but I don’t think you’re very MATURE. Don’t feel BLUE as I have GRATER plans for you... Why don’t we go dancing to BRIEYONCE? I hope this brings a smile to you.
• ​​Hope you have a Gouda birthday and enjoy being Gruyere older. Shame we can't Comte see you to say Halloumi but the world is Emmental at the moment!
• Nothing gets feta than a year’s supply of cheese! We camembert to not brie with you - there’s stilton’s of restrictions! But we hope you have a gouda time celebrating regardless! Absence does make the heart grow fondue so ricotta get through this! HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Get well soon Gift

• Dear Cheese Monkey, Recent studies have shown that a continuous intake of cheese reduces the severity of any illness. Please make sure you have a steady supply at this time. Get well soon, you might feel better if you stop googling your symptoms! Respectfully yours, Doctor Monkey

Congratulations on your new job

• The more you earn for yourself, the more you can spend on friends like me (or cheese, both are ‘grate’). Congratulations on your new job.

Goodbye gift for a colleague (hopefully not immediately after they’ve started their new job)

• It’s your last day! *sob* *throws self to floor* Because goodbye cheese is faaaaar better than goodbye cake, we’ve brought the cheese to you. You’re irreplaceable (although we’ve already found your replacement, and wow are they good)! ;)

Congrats on tying the knot

• Dear So & So, yada yada yada...It is a truth universally acknowledged that a couple finally in possession of a wedding licence, must be in want of a cheese subscription. So fill yer boots with fromagey filthiness and be forever happy! It’s official – you’re stuck with each other now!

Congrats on your anniversary

• Two golden rules to marriage. One of you is always right and cheese fixes everything. I can’t help you on the first one but this gift should help on the second. Happy anniversary lovebirds, congrats on making it through another year!

Congrats on your divorce (ideally you won’t be sending the same couple a wedding, anniversary and divorce gift) 

• We're sorry things didn't exactly work out, but a brie-llliant way to get your mind off things is with a love that will never leave.. cheese. 

Just because

• Please tell me you haven’t just gone vegan, because here's some fine cheese.

Happy Isolation (whilst we’d like to pretend COVID is not still a thing, unfortunately it’s still kicking around)

• Oh Cheesus, what do we have here?! A bundle of dairy deliciousness, the definition of joy in the Oxford English Dictionary. Covid sucks, you rock. Happy Iso!

Merry Christmas

• I’m dreaming of a White Christmas, but yellow works just as well. Hope you enjoy this festive selection of the yellow stuff. Merry Christmas
• Merry Christmas you filthy animal, bet you wish you were home alone without the fam. 

Happy Mother’s Day

• Happy Mother’s Day, I was going to bake you a cake to payback for years of homemade cakes but you raised a lazy child. Have some cheese instead...

Happy Father’s Day

• Happy Father's Day Dad. The king of the castle deserves to be treated accordingly today, so here's some cheese.

Happy Grandparent’s Day

• Grandma, I wouldn't dare take on your cooking, so I went for something cheesy.
• Grandpa, after all these years of life lessons, here's a cheesy thank you

Happy Children’s Day... actually scratch that one, why should the kids get an extra day

• We may or may not have lifted some messages from real life gift cards (OK we definitely have). Want to send someone a special gift? Check out our cheeseboxes page for some gift guide inspo.